These are my confessions
Sometimes..... you live your life in such a way that you think is full of everything you could ever want. People on the outside look at you and they envy your life and who you are. They want to be like you. Because you think your way of life is right, you often help lead people down a path that is not good. You can find no fault in the path you are on so you feel it's ok for others to walk this path with you.
Then....one day your eyes are opened and the veil that had once covered them and kept you blinded from the truth for so long is removed, and you begin to evaluate yourself and realize this perfect person, with this seemingly perfect life so full of everything was really empty, but full of imperfections. As a matter of fact, the realization of how flawed you are causes you to feel disgusted with yourself. You come to realize all the things you once held as important really were not important at all. And all of the stupid things you did and thought were fun and cute really are dangerous, irresponsible, and your behavior was definitely not cute. You look back and become ashamed of what you were, how you acted, but most off all how you treated others.
...He doesn't expect me to be perfect, but He expects me to put forth my best effort...
But now....things in my life still are not perfect and I'm not completely where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be. I'm on the right road now. I grew up in the church, knowing right from wrong and knowing about God, but unfortunately I had free wiil and that sometimes gets us into a little trouble. I finally found someone who can make every wrong decision I ever made go away. All the hurt I experienced in my life, but never told anyone about it, He can heal and remove the wound. For every person I mistreated, and everyone I laid with outside the bonds of holy matrimony, I can be forgiven for that too. I have been forgiven by accepting Christ into my life and living according to how He wants me to live!
That was the part everyone kept leaving out. Yes Jesus loves me and He will never leave me and He will forgive me of my sins, but nobody ever told me He wanted me to live a certain way. I was living a lifestyle so contradictory to what He wanted that I am surprised He didn't just take me out. Thank God for Mercy! I'm on the right track now and with the help of the Lord I will continue on. I found out on this walk, He doesn't expect me to be perfect but He expects me to put forth my best effort to obey His will and give myself totally and completely over to Him. That's the least I could do after all He's done for me.
Why do things you know are wrong and displeasing to God? When you know better, you should do better, and that's what I'm trying to do now, and for the rest of my life until Jesus come back for me. Oh yes, He's coming back and I don't want to miss out on my blessings from God and I really don't want to be left behind here on earth when Jesus return.